


call out my name

by romeas



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Childhood Friends, Enemies to Lovers, Irish Mythology & Folklore, M/M, Magical Realism, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:54:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28407297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romeas/pseuds/romeas
Summary: Donghyuck opened his mouth to say: "I don't know what's been worse; your absence," he stopped for a second and Mark wondered if he did it to add dramatism to the situation, "or your coming back.""Talking to me at last, are you?" Mark countered.Donghyuck offered him an unimpressed look."You are here, are you not?" Donghyuck asked.Mark swam until he was next to the rock Donghyuck was laying on while the other talked to him. "I am," Mark affirmed.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 8
Kudos: 73
Collections: Markhyuck Week 2021





	call out my name

**Author's Note:**

> helloooooo i cant believe i finished this fic at last lol this is heavily inspired by strawberry moon/blue moon by laia lopez AND i hope everyone enjoys it!
> 
> references:  
> new york, new york (1977)  
> the white ribbon (2009)

Fragile bird, wounded creature – let me tell you your sensibility, it's a bright and bitter gift; a sweet and sour virtue. Something innate in you, soft and painful. Don't expect others to be with you as you're with the world – it saddens me to see how tears adorn and embitter the pink of your skin.

* * *

“I think I know you,” Donghyuck said as he observed the other, crimson red and vibrant orange immediately catching his attention. His scales glowed under the rays of sunlight that reflected the water, making his skin shine as if he was standing under the sun on land, sprawled out on the sand by the shore, sunbathing on a regular summer day. He was sure he had seen them before – just not by the rocks, for sure. ”I know you from some place.”

“No,” the red haired merman said. His tail wavered behind him, calmly – it was beautiful, reds and oranges mixed together with white splattered on it, as if drops of paint fell onto it.

“You don’t remember me?” Donghyuck insisted, keeping his voice neutral, refusing to succumb to his nerves, not wanting to let anything go. His green and blue-ish tail danced from one side to the other, caressing his sides as if trying to calm him down – it ended up curling against his body, letting him know it was protecting him. His hands held his necklace with such force his fingers were turning white.

“No,” the other spat. His dry response felt like a gulp of air, like swallowing sea water when in land, like tearing off every single one of his scales.

“You don’t remember we met a few years ago? It was at a party or a dance,” his voice didn’t waver, not even once. He could feel the other’s gaze burning, looking straight at him. His tail started wavering, every second that passed it moved faster, alerting the other. Donghyuck’s own tail stayed quiet, curled against his waist. A smirk grew onto his face, noticing how startled the other became as he kept his cool, not letting his nerves get the best of him for once. He noticed his hair was a beautiful ginger, quite in between a very dark red and a faint orange. If he was being honest, it suited him a lot – made him look ethereal underwater. He wondered how it looked under the midday sun. 

“We had a long conversation. You can’t remember that?” He repeated, trying to get at least one answer out of the merman’s mouth. Donghyuck’s eyebrow arched, as if trying to challenge him, never losing the other’s gaze.

“No,” he replied at last. Donghyuck sighed. He decided to let it go.

“You’re too bright. Too lively. What are you doing here, by the rocks?” He grinned when the other gaped. “You’re too human.”

Donghyuck was too pleased to find the red haired merman had more than one face expression – he bit his bottom lip and his tail stopped moving as if it was too scared to make one wrong movement. It was no longer moving, no longer holding itself in front of him. There were no barriers left.

“I’m not a merrow, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Donghyuck hummed, bringing his hand to his face, softly tapping his fingers against his chin.

“If not, then why are you wearing that necklace?” He asked, pointing at his neck, where a red shell necklace was resting on top of his collarbones. It matches him, he thought, and stopped himself from saying it out loud. Red was really his color.

He saw him immediately catching it with his hand, hiding it behind his fingers, squeezing it almost too hard it almost broke. The other looked up into Donghyuck’s eyes but not a word left his mouth. “Is any of your parents a merrow?” He continued. “I have to admit, that would be a very weird case. Never heard of that happening in the pod. Merrows don’t mingle with other species… Not like the merfolk from the lagoon and humans. We’re not like them.”

“What about the lagoon?”

“Why are you here?” Donghyuck repeated himself, and he really didn’t like to do that.

He saw him shaking his head. “Answer me first.”

Donghyuck huffed and said: “May I remind you where you are? This is merrow territory.” His grin grew when he saw the other’s eyes widening.

“We’re in the dead-zone,” he replied, his tail slowly moving until it stood in between both their bodies.

“No, we’re not. Did no one teach you where the borders are?” He hummed. “Unless..” and his grin widened, realisation hitting him. “What’s your name?”

He saw him squinting his eyes at him, obviously not trusting him. Donghyuck almost laughed out loud.

“What?” The other unconsciously got closer to him, their tails almost touching. The deep green from his own and the oranges and reds from the merman contrasted each other very nicely.

“Your name. Tell me.”

“Why would I tell you? I don’t know you.”

Donghyuck swore under his breath. How dare he.

“That red shell you’re wearing… If you don’t know me, why are you wearing something of mine?”

“Every merrow has one.”

He licked the insides of his mouth, his tongue sliding through his very sharp teeth. He nodded and said: “You’re right… Though, you’ve clearly never left the lagoon. You’re from there, right? I know I’m not wrong. Merrows don’t leave the rocks. We don’t go to land.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“I think you stole it,” the other gasped.

“I would never. I didn’t steal it.. Why would I?” And furrowed his eyebrows. He looked confused but Donghyuck didn’t know the reason why. He either was excellent at lying or he was too naive.

“Someone could have dropped it…” the merman continued, dropping lie after lie. 

At this point, Donghyuck was allowed to laugh out loud, so he did, bringing his head back, his sharp teeth showing, tongue poking out from behind his canines, eyes widening in a maddening way. His tail was stoic behind him. He was having so much fun.

“No, they didn’t.” Donghyuck affirmed as he kept laughing loudly, starling the other even more. “They didn’t…. because we can’t breathe without them. I can assure you no one dropped theirs.”

When the merman was about to open his mouth and spit another excuse, Donghyuck interrupted him: “I want your name.”

He could see the other giving up, shoulders relaxing, no longer wanting to fight.

“It’s Mark.”

“Mark? Like the new Aysun?”

“How do you know that?”

He snickered, “Aysuns this, Aysuns that… Some shit about the lot of you being the children of the moon… Everyone knows who you are.”

“Oh,” Mark let out.

“I’m surprised you don’t know. Didn’t your mentor teach you everything you need to know?”

“She did. She’s just busy on land sometimes.”

That caught Donghyuck’s attention.

“She didn’t mention the dead zone? Or the borders?”

“I guess she did… She never expanded too much about it. Dayeon thought I would never leave the lagoon. Maybe go on land… Never too deep inside, where the rocks are, where the dead zone lies.”

“You should be more careful.”

“Of what? Merrows…? You?”

“After the war, merrows and the merfolk from the lagoon started to get along but… I don’t know where it went all wrong. I was too young. Thing is: Merrows decided to live away from them soon after, back to the depths of the sea.” A chuckle got caught in his throat. “We didn’t like the sunlight that much, anyways.”

He caught Mark staring directly at him, listening to his voice very carefully.

“Are you dangerous?”

“I’m a merrow,” Donghyuck nodded. “I’m inherently dangerous… but so are you.”

Donghyuck was convinced he saw a smile creeping up on Mark’s face.

Mark didn’t know, but Donghyuck lied to him. They weren't in merrow territory; they were right at the border of the dead-zone. Donhyuck liked to swim around it, sometimes bringing himself to explore the dead-zone too, he was too curious. Merrows weren’t loud species, not like humans, or the merfolk when some festivities were in place. Merrows liked to live in quiet peace but sometimes it got too chaotic. The dead-zone was right at the outskirts of the lagoon, a very quiet and peaceful place – if not disturbing sometimes – where only solitude habitated in.

The merfolk from the lagoon never got close to it, either. It was too quiet for them, used to the way of life of humans after so many years. Some of them partially lived on land. Humans swam in the waters of the lagoon and merfolk sometimes chose to live their life on land – giving up their tails and scales for a pair of legs.

Apparently, Mark was one of those. He loved to walk by the shore, mingling with humans, going to parties, meeting people and doing all the things he wasn’t allowed to in the lagoon. It was no wonder Dayeon never thought about him leaving what he knew – going away from the lagoon and land. He bet she would never think about him meeting a merrow, out of all species.

Donghyuck wasn’t so sure about Mark knowing the full potential of his powers.

Aysuns are powerful to say the least – way more than the regular merperson. They’re children of the moon, born under a full and wide-eyed blue moon. Gifted with special powers; they were dripping in energy, their aura becoming bigger, especially during full moons. The merfolk were always wary of them, letting them live their lives in solitude away from the pod, living on their own with their mentor as their only companion.

The other’s knew. They lacked power and Aysuns were above them. Perhaps they were scared – that was always their best excuse to not surround themselves with them.

At night, when the moon gleamed like floating coins all over the top of the waves, their powers lit up as if fireworks were, burning them like the delirium of the sun on a summer day. The moonlight protected them, gave them safety that came with healing powers.

A few days later, Mark caught himself paddling through the last hours of the high tide, the natural rhythm of the waves breaking against his kayak, cold waves lapping at his back, water splashed everywhere, the wind soaring.

He grimaced when he felt how wet his clothes were, soaked with water of the lagoon. Mark was wearing one of his infamous hawaiian shirts and it stuck to his body like the algae did when he got close to the rocks during a storm. 

His once dry red hair stuck to his forehead. Mark ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head, drops of water drawing a path from behind his ears, down his neck and to his chest. 

Days like this were his favourite kind. By himself, dancing through the waves with his kayak, not an orange scale in sight – just Mark, his human legs and the water soaking them. It was early in the morning, the waves were calm and the sun started peeking out, greeting him, welcoming him on this new day. 

The water underneath him was pitch black, only the faint light from the moon mirroring it. Mark stopped paddling and sighed, leaving the paddles on his lap as he looked up, closing his eyes and soaking on the remenments of the moonlight. He enjoyed the sunrise by the water.

Kayaking brought him a great sense of tranquility he didn't feel either on land or in the depths of the lagoon. He broke out of his stupor when he felt the water moving. There was a mixture of faint green and blue scales underwater when he opened his eyes. 

He instinctively tightened his grip on the paddles, clutching them with such force his knuckles hurt, his senses alerting him of the unknown. Whatever it was, it must have been swimming really close to the surface, the water too dark, only a hint of light yellow and orange reflecting on it. He felt an irrational anger build in the center of his chest, right under where his red shell necklace laid. Mark quickly came to the realization that he was being watched. 

He started paddling once again, trying to not lose his rhythm, getting out of the other’s sight. Not that it was possible – he could never escape when he wasn’t the one underwater. As a human, he was weak – traceable. 

The green shadow followed him wherever he went. The closer he got to shore, the faster the other’s movements became until the point Mark caught sight of a pair of blue – almost grey – scales. He stopped, out of nowhere, when he realised who was after him, when he realised who had been following him all this time. The other stopped too. 

Mark followed the shadow – turning brighter by the time, sun almost fully risen, sky a plain blue – with his eyes. His movements resembled a shark’s: doing laps around his kayak – and him —, observing his every movement under water, like a predator to its prey, like a shark to a seal.

He knew for certain he wasn’t going to be attacked, not by this merrow in particular – not by Donghyuck.

When the merrow grew tired of waiting for him, he supposed, a pair of grey orbs peeked out of the water, looking at him. Waves swayed before his eyes, wetting them, making them sparkle. Their eyes met for a slight second before Donghyuck decided to go back underwater. Water splattered all over him as a strong wave hit him to his side, making the kayak turn upside down. When he swam to the shore, leaving his kayak behind, he found himself alone in land, no merrow in sight, no one watching his every movement anymore.

Mark was confused. Merrows were never seen anywhere near the lagoon, even less near shore – they never went further than the dead-zone, they refused. Mark wondered why he was there. He waited for a while, sitting on a wooden bridge, feet in the water, doubting if Donghyuck was just messing with his head or if he really left for good. 

Whenever Donghyuck crossed his mind, Mark gripped his necklace tightly and brought the red shell to his lips, feeling the salty taste of the sea, of a water more turbulent than his home’s. He felt every edge with his lips, pressing it so hard it almost bruised. He sighed, blowing air from his mouth, finally kissing the shell and letting it fall to his chest so it rested on his collarbones, like it always was, where it always belonged.

The rocks were inaccessible underwater unless you were a merrow – it’s not that they inflicted any kind of protection to the barriers, their kingdom was too deep into the sea, where the sunlight barely reached and the water was as cold as a windy winter morning. 

Mark felt a breath of relief that he could get rid of his tail and grow a pair of human legs. Usually he wouldn’t do this kind of thing – venturing into unknown territory by himself, with no one to guide him and show him the right path. 

He wasn’t spoiled but sometimes his co-dependency on his friends – and his mentor, when she was around – made him feel like it. He lived in anguish, like he was choking on air all the time, burning inside, deteriorating by the minute. 

Maybe that’s why he started to spend time by himself more often these days. The company of his friends was always appreciated but he thought it was about time he learned to live by himself, to meet new people and have honest experiences.

Dayeon had sheltered him ever since he mentioned he had gone exploring one day at the age of nine years old. His younger self wasn’t aware of nearly nothing, he was a pure and naive merman, enjoying his time underwater, spending his days away swimming and visiting the shore so he could observe the humans.

He couldn't help the urge that burned within him, to explore new places, to discover new species. He had always been a curious kid. Once he had seen the lagoon to its entirety and visited shore enough times he recognised the humans that lived near it, he decided to challenge himself – to become more adventurous. He decided to swim lengths he once could only imagine, leaving the lagoon and its bright colours behind.

The moment the waters started to darken and less fish started showing up to greet him, tapping their tiny fins against his tail, he didn't feel as adventurous. The skin on his arms became dry, losing his glow – the water turned colder and his lips got chapped.

It only got worse when he realised there was a dark green shadow creeping up behind him.

He calmed down once he caught sight of a tail. It was unconventional but it wasn't any less beautiful. It didn't have sparkly shells like Mark's but the colours were mixed in a particular way it reminded him of the waves – they were gloomy, dark and strong. Very intense colours. Mark's head was pounding. He didn't understand what was happening. Never had he seen a merman with such dark colours that represented him.

Mark was so entranced with the other's tail, trying to put the pieces together. He thought he was the only one that dared to swim this far from the lagoon. Was he wrong? He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't notice the other swimming around him. The other merman wore a permanent frown in his face, his eyes were the darkest he had ever seen. A chill ran through his body when their gazes found each other.

He squinted his eyes, intently staring at the other, trying to figure him out. His skin didn't look like his own. Mark got startled when he noticed the red fins he had around his ears, so tall they reached the top of his head. He shaked his head hoping it would help him focus on the situation and decided to engage in a conversation.

It went like this:

"Your tail.. why is it like that?"

"What's wrong with it?" He didn’t know why the other decided to indulge him.

"The colours are weird. Look at mine! Why isn't yours sparkling? Are you sad? I didn't know there were mermans around here."

"I'm not a merman."

"But you're not human. I know humans and they have legs.. You clearly don't."

"I'm not a human either. Why are you asking so many questions?"

"I'm curious, why? Is it a bad thing to ask questions?"

"It’s impolite."

"Why is your hair silver?"

"Didn't you hear what I just said?"

"You're asking a question too! I think it's rude."

"You can think whatever you want."

"Questions aren't impolite."

"What?"

"That's what I think. What are you? Did I discover a new species? I can't wait to tell Dayeon. She's probably gonna get mad at me but it will definitely be worth it."

"A merrow."

"What?"

"I'm a merrow."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Any more questions?"

"I know you're starting to like them, aren't you?"

"I didn't say that."

"What's that thing on your neck? Can I have it?"

Deep inside, Donghyuck knew Mark remembered him, and if he didn't, Donghyuck definitely did. Mark was the first person to call Donghyuck beautiful. He rolled his eyes just by thinking about it – sweet and naive nine year old Mark had never seen such a creature before. All he knew were bright colours and light, so much light Donghyuck thought he would be blinded by it.

As the sand caressed his skin, he watched the lagoon from land. Mark was in a particular mood – usually watching the waves hit the sand with such gentleness helped him through the uneasiness but it didn't feel this way nowadays. He constantly felt on edge, watching his every move, always alert, almost paranoiac. He wasn't exactly scared, he felt unsafe in his own home.

Donghyuck wasn't supposed to swim further than the dead-zone, no one from his species was, but lately it became a common sight to see his large grey fins dancing around the border – closer to the lagoon every day.

Mark didn't know what it meant, he didn't know what the other wanted. It's like he was trying to communicate with him, trying to tell him something but always from far away, never getting too close. Though, Mark thought he was too close for his own comfort.

He felt the need to escape, even if it wasn't for much time. He could hide in land for weeks, months even; if he wanted to – and that was the cause of all his troubles.

Mark didn't want to run away. He lost his precious comfort in the lagoon, he didn't feel as safe underwater so he swam to shore and watched his red tail fade just as a pair of legs appeared.

He didn't want to run away but a few days on land apparently were a good idea. Visiting his human friends was always a good time and what he thought he needed at this moment. Sand stuck to his legs, still damp from the stickiness of his tail, wet from the water of the lagoon.

Mark was just confused. He didn't know why, after so many years. It was true that it was a coincidence they met earlier this month. It really was – and he really didn't recognise him at first. Or perhaps he did, but he didn't want to let himself go through it again. He couldn't handle meeting him, seeing Donghyuck in the flesh after so many years.

Mark lied —, but at the same time he told the truth. He didn't steal the necklace but no one gave it to him either.

He let that thought go when he realised the sand didn't stick to his legs anymore. The first person that came to his mind was Jeno.

Jeno was someone he met once on his late night walks, when the pressure underwater became too much and he needed a breath of fresh air – for the air to not burn deep in his lungs when he gulped —, to feel the wind against his face and have his skin become dry.

Mark was laying on the sand, his legs finally dry, when someone sat next to him. It was their usual time: a little bit after midnight, when it was dark enough to not recognise someone's face but perfect to appreciate their silhouette under the moonlight.

"Are you staying?"

Mark propped himself up on his side to look at him better. He still wondered why the other kept asking – why would someone try so much?

"Maybe this time I will," Mark vaguely told the other. He still wasn't sure if running away was the right choice.

"Is everything well?" He asked. Well because good wasn't always the right thing to say. Good meant there had to be a counter motive, there had to be a bad option. Jeno thought it shouldn't always be like that.

"Everything goes."

Jeno sat next to him with his legs crossed and drowned his hands on the sand, slowly letting a pile of it resting on top as he looked up at the moon. Mark thought he looked ethereal – which was weird. Humans are plain and simple, why would Jeno look like this?

Merfolk were ethereal by nature. It was the magic in the water of the lagoon that made them sparkle, their little shells that stuck to their skin and their tails.

Jeno nodded, "You can stay for a few days."

Mark looked at him, "Are you sure?"

Jeno took his time to look at Mark too, waiting a few minutes to answer.

"You're thinking about it... leaving the lagoon, aren't you?"

"For a week or two," he replied, breaking their eye contact. He couldn't bear to talk to him when he could read him like an open book. When Mark looked into Jeno's eyes he felt him staring deep into his soul, feeling exasperatedly transparent and he hated it.

"Everything goes," Jeno hummed, "Including.... you?" He hesitated with that last word, dragging it out, lowering his voice to an almost murmur.

"I saw him."

Jeno turned his face at him, trying to catch his gaze, trying to understand what Mark was saying. "Him..? Who?" Jeno asked with hesitance. The moment he saw Mark holding his necklace to his lips, his eyes widened.

"He came back?"

"He never left, you know. He's been by the rocks all this time, obviously."

"Obviously," Jeno huffed. "You never thought to look for him on his territory?"

"I never dared to cross the border..." Mark sighed and continued: "Yet he's been following me to the lagoon ever since."

"Is that why?" Jeno asked. Mark tilted his head in question.

"Is that why you're coming to me?"

A sad smile grew on Mark’s face.

There were fireflies everywhere. The sky was dark and the faint sound of the cicadas was the only thing that could be heard. Mark found himself walking near the shore, slowly approaching the rocks where all kinds of crabs could be found. He felt giddy only by thinking about it. He had heard from Jeno there was a cave near so he thought he might pay it a visit while he was on land.

He spent the last week at Jeno's – sleeping on his sofa until noon, going on runs after lunch, just enjoying the little time he had for himself. Jeno didn't spend much time with him but it was enough to see him return home every night. Seeing the other on the daily was surely an odd feeling. Mark's feelings were torn – he felt like he had to make a choice very soon.

Every evening Jeno would open his front door, greet Mark with a small smile and head towards his bedroom. At some point, he would come out and have something to eat, grab himself a drink and even sit with Mark on the couch while they enjoyed some silly tv shows. They would exchange some words, Jeno would tell him about his day, complain about his job and every single night he got up from the couch, looked at Mark, and without saying a word he headed to his bedroom to sleep.

Mark never really asked him. He didn't know if he was allowed to sleep with the other. He didn't ask but the truth is; he didn't think he could handle it. Being close to Jeno felt like too much nowadays; Jeno was always too warm, he felt too real in a reality he wasn't meant to be in.

There was a tacit agreement between them: they wouldn't ask too many questions, only the right ones – the ones that never went too deep. Their whole relationship was based on a really long small talk.

Mark didn't let himself get too caught up on his thoughts. He kicked the little shells that got caught in the sand as he walked by the beach. At this late hour, the sea was calm and Mark's head felt like it was about to explode. He crouched next to the water, letting his feet get wet, not even worrying about cuffing his jeans. When the little waves approached him, he caught a handful of water with his hands and cleaned his face with it.

Contrary to popular belief, he didn't turn when the water touched his skin – as long as he was wearing Donghyuck's necklace, he wouldn't.

It hurt him, in some way —, to know that the other had such a big presence in his life all of these past years while he didn't even cross his mind not even once. As he got closer to the cave, he realised the path was drowned by the high tide, impossible to cross without saying goodbye to his beloved legs.

Mark wondered if Jeno did it on purpose.

Mark walked into the water until it covered his whole body, then held his necklace with one hand and waited. He relaxed his shoulders, letting all the pressure go, letting the water swallow it all, finally getting rid of everything that made him stay. After a very long week, it felt weird to see his tail; it clearly missed him, seeing how it curled against his torso, squeezing his body with such force he couldn't breathe for a second. This was the longest period of time he spent out of the lagoon without paying intermittent visits to wet himself in the magic water, letting his powers restore.

His tail wasn't as bright as it was a week ago but he didn't think much of it. Perhaps his magic weakened during this time.

He swam, following the path underwater until he reached the other side where the cave awaited him. Mark gaped when he saw the interior of it. Everywhere he looked at was soaked in a beautiful purple; the walls were overflowing with beautiful gemstones. It was like he was bathing in a sea of amethyst stones and there, in the middle of it all, lay a figure with silver hair and a blue tail that contrasted almost perfectly with the rocks. It was almost ironic.

The other one, who looked like was enjoying his alone time, lying peacefully on top of the rocks, the ends of his tail brushing the water of the cave, opened his eyes and huffed with that low tone of his when he looked at Mark. 

Donghyuck opened his mouth to say: "I don't know what's been worse; your absence," he stopped for a second and Mark wondered if he did it to add dramatism to the situation, "or your coming back."

Certainly, Mark wasn't expecting his day to go like this – he really just wanted to have some peace and quiet for one evening after spending a week with a human. Not that it was a bad thing; living with Jeno was always a comforting experience but humans were just too loud sometimes. He missed the quietness of the sea, the slow tide of the lagoon. He wasn't sure if he missed his encounters with the merrow, though.

"Talking to me at last, are you?" Mark countered.

Donghyuck offered him an unimpressed look.

"You are here, are you not?" Donghyuck asked.

Mark swam until he was next to the rock Donghyuck was laying on while the other talked to him. "I am," Mark affirmed. "How did you know I would be here today?"

"Do you think everything I do revolves around you?" He said. "I must inform you the world doesn't work like that, Mark."

Mark, surprised, turned to him and said: "You said my name."

Donghyuck arched his eyebrows at him. "...Am I not supposed to?" He cautiously asked.

"No! I mean— You haven't said my name ever since... You know. I didn't think you would want to." He stumbled through his words as he kept talking, trying to put his thoughts together.

"I do refer to you with your name in my head all the time. You're just not aware of it." Mark noticed a glint in Donghyuck's voice but, at the same time, he could see his eyes get softer around the edges. Mark sighed.

"Are we ever going to talk about this?" Mark asked.

"That's not what you wanted to ask. C'mon, Mark— Just say it."

Donghyuck propped himself on his elbows, and waited for Mark's response.

Mark hesitated for a second while looking at his companion, sight locked in Donghyuck's tail.

"Are we ever going to talk about...us? About what happened. Why did you suddenly leave; why are you here now? That's— Yes. That's what I really want to know."

Donghyuck nodded, eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed as if he was actually thinking about the questions and looking for a decent answer to give him.

"I never really left. I've been here all this time; in the rocks," Donghyuck said. "You didn't leave, either. You've been in the lagoon. We just stopped seeing each other; I visited the dead-zone every now and then thinking I could maybe see you there: you were never there but so wasn’t I when you came here. We drifted apart, we grew up and our priorities changed. It's normal."

"I— I think you're right but it doesn't mean it hurts any less. Or it did hurt back then."

"Not anymore?"

"I mean.. You're here now so.. I can't really miss you if you're in front of me."

"You're naive," Donghyuck grinded his teeth.

"For missing you?" Mark retorted.

"For missing something you never had," with his cheeks resting against his hand, he scoffed.

"I hate it when you say shit like that."

"You like having everything handed to you on a silver plate. I won't do that."

"That's not true," Mark disagreed. "I want to have a normal conversation without you being difficult."

Donghyuck flicked a gaze in his direction. "We are."

"We are not. We _never_ do," Mark emphasized. "Perhaps that's why we drifted apart and not whatever you convinced yourself with. Yes, we grew up but people only leave if you let them."

Donghyuck shook his head, truly astonished by Mark's words. It was quite odd finally knowing what the other thought.

Donghyuck chuckled. "I simply can't get enough of you."

Mark sighs, raking a hand through his hair. "See? It's impossible to talk to you."

Donghyuck yawned and stretched his arms over his head. He looked at him with a bored expression. "I'm here because of you. Do you think I like getting out of the dark waters? We live there for a reason." He grimaced.

Donghyuck slipped from the rock until the water covered the entirety of his body.

“I’m here because of you,” he repeated. He brushed Mark’s hair with his fingers.

“I heard you the first time you said it,” Mark retorted.

“Did you? It doesn’t look like you did,” Donghyuck said, playfully jabbing at Mark’s chest, running his fingers through his collarbones.

“I did,” Mark replied.

Donghyuck hummed and asked again: “Why aren’t you doing anything about it then?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say – or do, for that matter. I never really understand you.”

“I said: I won’t give you everything handed to you on a silver plate.”

Mark tilted his head in confusion.

“You’re so frustrating,” Donghyuck exclaimed. “I don’t like that I have to do everything myself.”

Mark gaped. “I don’t kn—” he wasn’t able to finish the sentence because a pair of pale but really moist lips pressed against his own. Mark didn’t know if he should be surprised about it, but that didn’t stop him from letting out an astonished sound, startling Donghyuck and making him break the kiss.

“I think I… understand you now. I think?” Mark’s eyebrows furrowed, a small smile dancing on his lips.

“I really like your voice but I don’t wanna hear it right now,” what he was saying didn’t match the smirk Donghyuck wore on his mouth.

“That’s a bit rude. Why would you say that?”

“Did you forget? Questions are impolite.”

“Are not.” Mark countered.

Donghyuck ignored him and shrugged, not really caring about what Mark was saying – his attention was somewhere else.

Mark waited; but nothing came. The merrow kept looking at him with a glint in his eyes.

Donghyuck tilted his chin up and declared: “I told you I don’t like to do everything myself.”

After all, it has alway been a bit difficult for Mark to understand Donghyuck. And, for the first time, Mark had no doubts when he decreased, second by second, the distance between their mouths, and collided with Donghyuck’s; letting out a whine – Donghyuck knowing in that exact moment that Mark wanted this just as much as he did.

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on cc or twt
> 
> leave kudos n comments if u liked it! <3


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